March On!

~How foolish are we to have believed that we can alter our destiny through the modern inventions. | KZJ (or ME)

Pretty much how my birthday month started: FOOD.

 It's finally March. And (if you're following my gibberish-ing here) you might be wondering what has happened to my About Cheeze in 30 Days Challenge - I know I promised I would finish this challenge to the end (even if I had to finish it outside the given 30 days) but I've thought about it and the last two questions are sort of vital and would certainly define my whole being. With that said I've decided to not include them - so technically, I am done with the challenge. 

Here are the two last parts of the challenge and why I think I should leave it as... it is...

Day 29- In this past month, what have you learned?

~ I am a great lover of new things, new experiences, and new anything. I constantly learn from my mistakes, from other people, from whatever I read (books, the Internet, or Google... maybe, even Twitter! Gawd!). I am always thirsty for knowledge - sometimes, even those things that I don't have to know because for sure it's gonna hurt me or keep me preoccupied one way or another. I also have this tendency to learn-relearn-unlearn things --- so, until everything is intact in my system that's when I'll give you information on things that I've learned - those that are life changing and not just the trivial one. 

Ok. I'm just too lazy, really.

 
Day 30- Who are you?

~Because I, honestly, am not sure who I am right now. Well... Probably this:

Yeah. Figure me out, right?

I've been wordless these past few days because I often feel tired and sort of unhealthy. I don't know. I guess it's time to see the eye doctor and get those glasses - the cool ones, hahah!


horchata,

~tSin

She Was.

Every bone's been broken,
But my heart is still wide open.
~Katy Perry, Self-Inflicted

 Day 28- A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?

Me NOW | Me THEN

Those photos were taken on the same month of each year, of the same event... January | Sinulog

The pictures are easy to find but the answer to the question: how have you changed since then?

That seems to me quite a hard question I could stammer if I had to be asked in front of a large crowd, impromptu.

Aside from the fact that my hair is now a bit curly and longer (probably, longer than it has ever been!)...

I still like pink. 

I still laugh like a boy guffawing over some boy movie or something.

Generally, I'm still the same old Tsin with a few bruises here and there over lessons learned the hard way or so.

But with all of those lessons life has taught me in the past few months -- the later months of 2010 -- I feel that I am now on my way to the road of a better me.

Until this year ends, I wouldn't know yet just how much I have changed exactly.

Maybe then, we'll have to wait for another 11 months?

That's almost... SOON :)

she is,

~tSin

Break Even.

Before anything else... let me tell you how... Sometimes I could get too silly to be thinking that most people wouldn't want me in their lives any longer --- well, maybe it's true for some but maybe not for most. Whatever it is though... I'm just happy I still have friends and true ones that I can laugh with, share coffee(or not)-drunken nights, can share secrets and dreams with, and those that may be really far away from me but are still there and are still my friends when we finally meet each other again. Oh! I am just thankful that I have friends! They are my ultimate sanity-savers! They really are!

Day 27- Why are you doing this 30 day challenge

I am doing this 30 day challenge to challenge myself into doing something that has at least a goal and a deadline. But hey look at me! I am waaay past my deadline on this. I am definitely still working on it. I've got 3 more days. In the past days, I have been nothing but lazy watching movies with Tim, sleeping, and then running some. Of course, there's work that usually got in the way because calls are piling up like pancakes or hollow blocks on a 10-storey building that should be finished by tomorrow or who knows. Well, well, I guess I've failed in the challenge. But I hope, to anyone at all who's reading this, that you got to know me better. That I am just no lazy kid but also someone who's got stuff to do if she has to :D 

My head is in a swirl right now cuz after some halo2x with Tim we dropped by his best friend's house and we each drank a bottle of beer, well, vodka ice for me. We had to get up early today because we've agreed last night to run and so we did... with swirling heads! Hahaha! Still made it though ;)

Let me leave you with this before I go and hit the sack to prep up for tonight's work:

better hope you're not alone,

~tSin

Memories of Me Will Fade Soon.

"See everyone arrayed for you to try
You're not alone in being alone
Six billion humans - one of them's right for you"

~Kate Havnevik, Halo.

Day 26- What you think about your friends

 I just don't think but I do believe that my friends are really AWESOME and AMAZING. Not to mention they are definitely cool too. Truly people that I can count on when I need them it's just that I am the one who shuns shoulders offered :| I hope I don't get misinterpreted on that... because if I should have to tell the reason why with all honesty... which I will be doing now, actually... as much as possible I keep things to myself and resolve them with as little aid as possible because I know that everybody's got things going on in their lives as well and I just don't, don't, don't want to add any more to their burden. 

I am definitely thankful that I've got friends who care about me. A simple hello (no matter how cliche) from them is an incredible way of knowing that somehow in their busy lives they still remembered me. 

I wanted to post pictures of my ALL of my friends here, but I don't want to get into a fatal crime of missing to post pictures of some due to forgetfulness (and with the gazillion pictures that I do have in this and that computer it would be very difficult to just put all the blame on me!)... to be safe, let this picture be a symbolic one for them :)

My friends and my feelings for them is like this body of water... overflowing and endless. It will get through to the end no matter how rough the tides.

taken a few years back | Kawasan Falls, Badian, Cebu

It might look like there is a boundary right there that stops the water from flowing, but really, if you go there, you'll see that there is nothing at all that divides it. It flows on and on and on...

For those friends that I have offended because I am too passive at times I am deeply and truly sorry. But know always that I am just here, willing to help whenever I can! Just call my name...

I'll be there,

~tSin

P.S.

Because I love my friends, here's a  plug for the lovely Lovely Joy.

I'm helping her out in funding for her upcoming Church wedding on July of this year.

Buy this bag and help her out, too!

It's an authentic Prada tote and if only I could afford it I would've bought it.

 P15,000.00 only =)

♥

Isn't that a beauty? I would really want it for myself but again... not now.
I'm also saving up for something big coming my way in the future ;)
If you're interested please pm me. 
ADOPT IT NOW! 

THE INVENTORY: In the Loot.

"If you wanna know a person, take a look at what's inside his bag."

                                                                                         ~Me☺

Day 25- What I would find in your bag

Finally, finally, finally! The long wait is over... well, at least my long wait is over! Yeah, I've been really excited on posting this here already and when I found some good "me-time" yesterday (while Tim was out jogging to give those muscles the greatest fix ever!), I didn't waste time at all! I immediately scavenged my bag and took pictures of it and everything inside it! :D Now, now here's a little disclaimer before you proceed... this is going to be really girly... if you're not interested in these kinds of stuff you are certainly free to go or you're free to check out my archives.

Please do forgive me. I'm actually talking to myself. Hahah! Anyhoo, don't tell me I didn't tell you I told you so! Peace ;)

First up... *drum roll*

THE BAG, of course.

Not my favoritest of all the bags that I own, but I do like this because all of my stuff can be properly arranged inside! It's a Gap canvass (I think) bag. Because I'm not really very familiar as to how bags are specifically classified - for me, for as long as it's comfortable and big enough to accommodate my necessity babies... that will surely work!

So moving on... to the contents.

NOT TOTALLY EVERYTHING just yet! :)

1. the bag.

2. my pink umbrella (wc needs some sewing, btw!)

3. work i.d - couldn't live without it!

4. a slim bangle which is a part of a 7-day set (and the others are in another bag)

5. diy journal. pimped, actually :)

6. my ever beloved Walkie the cellphone ^^,

7. Judge gum.

8. little gadget pouch

9. ultimate kikay kit (floral and very sweet)

10. my lucky wallet (supposedly! heheh)

11. native pouch come cellphone case (my mother's pasalubong from...I forgot! :|)

but I will let you know once I do! 

12. iPhone... that's just the name of my spare phone. Haha! I like it

because it's super cute and it's.... PINK of course!

13. lucky coin purse (gifted by colleague, Juno and I'm soo happy that it's still alive 

until now! I really love that it's black and sparkly! I'm such a fish!)

14. Tim's USB which I've borrowed and constantly bring... just in case!

(will be putting in black swan in there a few minutes! :D)

15. Victoria's Secret - Secret Charm scent. Just a random pick and nothing

very special with a very special and interesting story.

16. Alcohol. One of the many, many things I could never live without.

Call me OC. I will admit!

Piece by piece, tear it up (not!)

The pouches!

 1. My floral kikay kit and gadget pouch.

They're pretty stuffed if I must say. They really are!

Sometimes I could hear them cry cuz they're all jammed up inside :(

2. Safety pins. They can always come in handy.

You'll never know when a wardrobe malfunction would kill you.

3. Contents of my gadget pouch:

~card reader in a see through pink pouch

~Stabilo Boss in pink

~G-tech - I don't write with anything else unfortunately and I don't know why.

~Silver and Pink metallic pens for special occasions :)

~Scissors. You'll never know when you need one. 

~Nail cutter. Very useful.

All my phone chargers are not even there, but yes they do fit!

4. Hair clips. Sometimes my bangs and hair can really go in the way...

so these can really go in handy for a good hair SOS.

It takes make up to look natural ;) 

Guess who said that!

YES! Calvin Klein!

 1. toothbrush, toothpaste and floss in another pink see-through pouch.

2. Paganini 5-brush set plus a concealer brush that I forgot where I bought! :o

3. Ponytails. Cuz in this humid and warm country it is definitely a no-no to just let your hair

down and fly with the wind+dust all day.

4. random lash curler (prolly my sister's)

5. Maybelline eye & lip make-up remover. I bring it with me in my kikay kit

in case of make-up malfunction and also if I find myself too lazy to go home

and opt to sleep at Tim's instead.

6. Vaseline healthy white lotion. I like to keep it in my kit because it's so small

and definitely saves me loads of space! Plus! It works fine with my skin, too :)

7. Myra-E lip balm. 

The first time I tried it on (before I even knew Carmex existed!)

I fell in love with it. It made my lips smooth to the touch.

8. lipstick tubes in: coral, nude pink, vibrant violet (fave)

and shimmery (almost like a lip balm :D)

9. Girl's Night nourishing body cream - which I only put on when I am to see Tim.

Which is like almost everyday. Hahaha! But I love the scent of it...

Peonies and waterlilies! Hmmm!

10. Avon liquid eyeliner. Not the best but I like it somehow 

because it's too easy to apply! 

11. Double eyeliner in silver and black. 

Did you know that silver and white eyeliner will make your eyes look

more vibrant and stress-free? Try it :)

12. lip and cheek tint. I love the soft touch of pink in it.

It makes me look sooo innocent and 16 :p

13. ELF duo eyeshadow cream in butter pecan ♥

14. Lush lip tint (given by my wonderful friend Teenee) I love its bubble-gum scent!

15. lip liner. I figured that if I put on lip liner on my lips 

before putting on the last shade of lipstick it will make the color last longer :) 

16. a lipstick sampler. it's sooo cute and the color is also nice. So I'm keeping it :)

17. ELF blush in blushing rose (I think! A gift from my sister Lique. I learned 

all of my making-up skills from her :D)

18. Clear mascara for lazy breezy days.

19. my bestfriend, Petroleum Jelly! Could be used as a make-up remover, too!

Thanks to Lois to that. She was the one who said I try it.. so I did.

And a miracle just happened!

20. Avon daring definition mousse mascara.

21. Olay Natural White - because I can't live without moisturizer.

22. Avon true color blush -- because I love it's semi-peachy color.

23. ELF Corrective concealer (Another gift from Lique! She's a big fan of concealers.)

24. Maybelline shine free face powder. It really is a must have!

Makes your face look smooth and flawless all day long.

Even in pictures! :)

25. Avon solutions refined white make-up base.

I've been looking for too long for a make-up base and good thing that this

was on sale. I then bought 2 in mint! It's really nice to the skin and gives you that

healthy and flawless face look... naturally :)

WOW! Doing that was like baring my soul. But I know that only a few get to stumble upon this blog. Heheh... I hope you enjoyed my babbling about though! And to those who are planning to ask (assuming!), yes, I am a big lover of pink and make-up but it doesn't mean that I wear pink all of the time (from head to foot) and that I wear make-up most of the time, too (like Audrey Hepburn, even in her sleep! Well, at least in the movies! heheh..)

This entry I leave to you who reads this :) Thank you so much! I appreciate your dropping by every now and then! 

PIT SENYOR CEBU! 

Julie and Me... Waiting for the Holy Mass @ Sto Niño ♥

angst away,

~tSin

P.S.

If you're wondering why I don't keep a comb with me... this I honestly say, that although I use it occasionally, I'd rather have my hair unkempt. I just love it that way :D

The Once Little Spoiled Brat.

Day 24- A letter to your parents

I still feel pretty much the same way about my parents now since the day I wrote this letter.

Please click on that link to recall what I've written to them a not so long time ago ;)

"Ma and Pa, I love you of course. No matter what! Thanks so much for everything! -tinaj"

lost symphonies,


~tSin

Of Caprices and Cravings.

Day 23- Something you crave for a lot

I am such a weird person when I crave because I could crave for anything... as in, indefinite anything! It could be food that I don't know, it could be music, it could be a scent, it could be ice cream or fro-yo, it could be shoes or bags or clothes or even a food that I see on tv or overheard from someone. I am very easy to lure and entice! Hahaha!

Sometimes I'd be going around the mall and smell a mouth-watering scent and I'd go gaga asking whoever is with me that time (most of the time, The Boyfriend) what that scent is and there are some annoying times that I wouldn't let it go at all until I find it. I must say I'm sort of difficult to deal with at times, but it's all worth it cuz I'm really sweet and nice and everything else heavenly most of the time. There are also times when I'd find myself window shopping, finding a perfect thing to splurge on but couldn't afford so at the moment and then not getting any sleep at all that night because I couldn't stop thinking until I finally get it... and for things that I could never get... I just treat myself into something else like pudding from La Fortuna or some good flavored ice cream.

So what do I crave for a lot then?
.I C E C R E A M.
not too obvious yet?


^______^

And in the holidays, the freezers got a bounty full of them :)

Now, now... I heard a colleague talked about Sago at Gulaman. Guess what? Indeed! I am now craving to get one from Pino. Their Sago at Gulaman is the best one that I've ever tasted yet! I swear!

caprices and cravings,

~tSin

Spell tSin

My mood never seems to meet the mood of the world.
Picture this:

When I'm happy the world is mourning for something else.


And when I'm down, way deep down into the dirt, because of sadness the world is celebrating with guffaws and everything else so festive it hurts to be even bothering anyone.

Oh well. I guess I'm just sort of unique that way. So... setting me apart from everyone else.

I guess that's what makes me different from the uniqueness of all the other earthlings.

Making this blog an official entry for...

Day 22- What makes you different from everyone else

Hoof! There are two days more before the new year sets in. I just have to be a better me by then or before 2011 ends, that is.

I'm a diplomat's son,

~tSin

Nothing Else.

Day 21- A picture of something that makes you happy

ICE CREAM is my bad-depressing-day cure.

I know this picture is not really ice cream, but this is like the most current photo I have for an ice cream - we'll just use this for now, ok?

Just imagine it's ice cream just all the way better and fresher. Hahaha!

See? Just writing about it is making me sooo high.

It really is a food made in heaven!

Made out of fluffy clouds and sweet November rain syrup!

Yum! :)

Ok. Going now.

Have to resolution-shop.

JK!

don't change because they asked you to,

~tSin

There is No Reason Needed in Loving.

Day 20- Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future

But of course...

I would fall in love with this boy-man a million times over and still won't regret a thing.

I love him beyond words, beyond the world.

He is the only one I'd ever want, need, and love.

And I am never ashamed to admit it.

Because I love him and I just do.

his for everything,

~nOj <3

The Names They Say are Mine.

Day 19- Nicknames you have; why do you have them

Since I am too lazy... I am just glad that this came in handy!
I know things are really going to be useful... in time ;)

So here goes a long account of the names people call me now and then... and from DAY 1 ^__^

"Well don't call me by my full name,
And all this is temporary.
-Circa Survive, The Difference Between Medicine and Poison Is In the Dose

11.05.08
12:01:23
--time takes its toll on us--


Hello my dear friends I am Tsin and I love Purple Bingkas!
That is lame.
And I apologize (it's too late... chocolate.)
Ugh. I'm just not sure what to say
or what to put here...
RV tagged me to do this name thing like a month or so ago.
And I think it's time that I post this here cuz I feel that I need to
do something else aside from just lying on the bed and what not...
cuz I am sick again. FLU SEASON they said.
Anyway, I'm not really sure of the mechanics of this
but I will try to put in the names that I have.
This is like looking back to the names that were
(and didn't I just blog something about forgetting the past? haha!)
OK. this is an exemption!

I dug deep into my memory to retrieve the names that people
-friends, family, classmates, office mates-
used to call me... and still call me.

my full name:

KRISTINA ZAFRA JOSON

I hardly tell anyone at all my full name and here I am broadcasting it! (HAHAH! not really!) some months ago I posted some of my photos here in multiply with a little story of how I used to hate my first name (http://cheezenibbles.multiply.com/photos/album/132/Cheshires_-_NOT), KRISTINA, so much. The name for me is just not as sophisticated as what my classmates back in elementary days had. Like Anthea Lirio, Niña Kristie, Helen Grace - all of them have second names and I didn't so it really sucked. Blah. I always took the chance to whine to my mum as to why she has given me that first name and she was always patient in explaining to me how (read:) LOVELY my name was, it made me all the more frustrated. And there's this one incident back in grade school that I would never forget really... Sharmi, a classmate of mine in elementary, and some of our other classmates and I were playing this game (it's not really a game, it's more of an INSULTING-THE-NAME game) to try to change our names into its most vernacular translation, meaning pabisayaon daw among name and they were exchanging funny names for themselves until I was tagged... and dear Sharmi was like, "AYAW NALANG NA SIYA OI CUI BISAYA NAMAN NA IYANG NGAN DAAN!" and it was followed by a roaring laughter and a series of affirmations and never-ending guffaws! UGH! I thought the world was gonna end... I was so mad at her I had to knock off her stroller after classes (Yes. I was a bit bratty back then ). She caught on and learned her lesson and never talked about my name that way. Yay (heheh.) To make this long explanation short, I began to like my name when I started to see actresses on TV with the same name as me. I realized that mum was right after all Kristina is not as bad as Saturnina or Celestina or Catalina (my grandmother's name) or worst - Carmelita (my sister's name! Whew!). That is also why my name had to end with a "NA" because of my granny's name. So there. I have embraced it and loved it and still do (Uh. Not really! Hahah!)!

***

Most of my nicknames are derived from my first name - pretty boring, but if you can read on you will see the
transformation. Yay!

TINA

the first and not to mention the most boring nickname that I have ever had! most of my friends who have known me for so long and my family calls me this.

TIN/TIN2x

shortcut to Tina (obviously). most people who calls me Tina also calls me Tin or Tin2x, but I really don't like it.

TINZ

there is this one particular person who calls me this and that is Mary Joy (a.k.a Ejang) my classmate in college. I love the way she calls me this and how her perfect teeth would be exposed everytime she says: "TIIINNZZ!"

TINATOOTS

my friend Jairus is the only person who calls me this. i don't know where he got that but it sounds cute, too! hahah!

TINAJ

thanks to the genius Nik2x for inventing this. this nickname is the combination of my overused nick and the first letter of my family name. Nik2x started this all and eventually, ni-sunod na ang tanan na makadungog asta akong papa and whole family na jud dayon. hahah!

TJ/TEEJ

Nik2x also calls me this and I can't remember who else from our elementary barkada.

NAJ

a shortened version of Tinaj. hahah! Jingle calls me this most of the time.

TINAJEZIE

this is really funny and only Mijol calls me this.

JANIT

edward used to call me this and he really thought that my real name was Janit and Tinaj is just
a variation spelled backwards. Hahah! I remember him saying: "KA BISAYA POD ANA IMONG PANGAN OI!
JANIT!" Lolz!

NOJ/NOJ2x

Tim calls me this. i think cuz the first time we ever met he couldn't seem to get my nickname
Tinaj right, he was thinking it was Inoj. so there! he ended up calling me Noj or Noj2x (kung mamarayg DAW. hihi.)
up to now and i'm cool with that.

TSINA

I used to find Tinaj as a unique name until I went to college.. I had this one classmate whose name sounded like "NAJ" so I thought it was time to change Tinaj into some other name and comes in Tsin. I just had to move the "S" from kriStina next to "T" (ang ba sad. heheh.)

TSIN

this is like my most favoritest (hahah!) name that I have ever had! most of my friends from college and
more of my newer friends call me this and I just LOOOVVVVE the sound of it!

TSIN2x

my friends would call me this instead of saying "Hi" whenever we run into each other somewhere. but Rangi
calls me this with a matching "kumot2x" sa akong arms. heheh.. murag mangigil jugh sya!

TSINOT

bugal2x sa Tsin. heheh...

TSINAY FUSION

Party calls me this every now and then. Hahah! there's this one restaurant in our building which name
is Tsinoy Fusion - she got it from there. She would be like "HOI TSINAY FUSION, UNSAY AU?!"

TSINAY

some friends would also call me this... but the only persons i can remember calling me this
would be Party and Teenee, I think.

TSINNY

this is what Teenee calls me and I think she might be the only person who calls me that, too.


And here are some of my other interesting names:

KATRINA

i don't really know why everytime I am introduced as Kristina the next time I see that person
to whom I was introduced to they would call me Katrina. Kristina - Katrina? Hmmm..

INSIK

i might look like one, but my grandparents were from a Spanish decent (well at least my
grandmother - pop's side and my lolo - mum's side). i wish i looked a bit more like my
lolo. he was the loveliest person i've ever seen! he really looked like Mr Eddie Garcia.

INDAY/DAY

my mum calls me this whenever she needs something. heheh...

BABY

my pop calls me this and i know it's really mushy, but it's sweet, too. and though we're not
really that close anymore i know that i will always be his baby. i might be the eldest, but
everyone in the family treats me as though i am the youngest. hoorah!

ALIMANGO/CRAB

this is another name my pop calls me. he said my pinches are very crab-like. he couldn't
stand it sometimes. hahah! but i love pinching his palm! hmmm.. i miss that!

ATE

my siblings call me this with due respect. hahah!

KRISTENAUX

my sister, Lovely, is the only person who calls me this and she calls me this
everytime she needs something, too! haha!

JASON

my english teacher in high school - Miss Lopez calls me this because of my last name Joson.
isn't that weird? Jason? ok.

DUDE

this is like an endearment for my dear friend Candie and me. we started calling each other this right after we
got off training.


TINANG

Hanna calls me this and i remembered that there was a time when i told her to stop calling me
the name Tinang. it doesn't really sound that good, but then i also started to call
her Haning - we're square!


some other names that people call me (nya gikapoie na kog explain so kamo nalng bahala! hihi)

tsinaxe, tinapay, tinabal, tsinita, kris, kristine, baboy, GWAPA, t, tsinisyou, cheeze, cheezenibbles,
joson, anak mam joson. "

Can you invent your own name for me? :) Let me know and we'll find out if you beat all of those other names ;)

yeah, don't call me by my full name,

~tSin

I'm Wonderstruck.

~Lord I give you my heart.

Day 18- Plans/dreams/goals you have

I'm wonderstruck cuz I always get stuck when asked about the greatest of things... yeah, like these. Plans, dreams, goals? Oh wow! They sound so grown up it scares me. Seriously though, I was always the kind who let things happen to her. Who's neither happy nor sad if things won't go her way, but when wants something would do anything to get it. I don't set definite plans for myself honestly... My motto was and I had to emphasize that cuz this is a motto of the past:

"Let the present worry about the present, the future will have to take care of itself and the past has already gone away and will never ever come back. So why worry? Don't haste, be merry, and live life!"

More or less, that's still sort of my motto but not at all the whole of it. Because I realize that I should stop letting things happen when they happen... I should make them happen by grabbing every opportunity laid out in front of me as much as possible. And I've realized that I do know what I want but my big problem is that I don't have like a blueprint or a map or a guide as to how to reach my visualized end, how to make my dreams come true, how to make these plans real and not just some thought lying empty on some tissue paper or something.

I think I should start with saving up and keeping my work attendance as flawless as flawless could be because these might be really small things, but in the grander scheme of things these could surely take me a long, long way from here. One step at a time.

But I do hope in the future to get a stable life, to get married, to have kids, to live longer to see my grand kids and take care of them as I took care of my own family, to see my parents live in peace, comfort, and convenience. And oh, to be totally, totally debt-free!

sparks fly,

~tSin

I May Be Rude But I'm the Truth.

(find me!)

Day 17- Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why


WOW.

I honestly don't know! I am happy being me and I'm pretty sure someone's life which might look all cozy, sunny, and dandy from the outside may not be so inside. I know I don't have everything yet in the world, but again I am happy that I am who I am. That I am no artista who dodges paparazzis now and then. I am happy that I could be who I am whenever I want to and the people who judge are those only who are envious of me which I totally could ignore at any time I want because I won't be in the tabloids anyway come tomorrow. I am happy being me because I am surrounded with amazing friends, harmoniously bonded with prudent colleagues, loved so much by my family and my boyfriend. So what could I ask more?

Uh, maybe... her.

photo from here :)


it's automatic,

~tSin

Time Can Take Its Toll On the Best of Us

Day 16- Another picture of yourself (baby pic!)

I'd like to think that I am still a baby in this picture :)
That's my dad right there and his hair's still long ♥
I am forever going to be a self-proclaimed papa's girl no matter how hard and badly I try to get over that phase!
That's our very first car ever which my dad personally assembled and converted into a mini pick-up;
I remember, everyone in school was envious of this *sniggers*
Sadly, we no longer have it with us :(
No more cars registered under our name *sniffs*
But one day, you wait and see.
*hums*
:D

Gahhh... looking at all of these pictures make me want to cry. Seriously. Makes me think of the time I have to save to think over what I really want to do with my life. Tim said I shouldn't worry because I will eventually find it out along the way... I just have to trust Him, God. My friends say that God will one day remind me of what I've been wanting and wishing for too long but somehow forgotten about and it makes me sort of sad because if you only knew what I wanted sooo much some five years or so ago :( I am totally envious of those who have plans all laid out for them since day one. I am one of the many who doesn't have any clue at all on what to do with my life right now. I hope and pray that one day I wake up enlightened. I just really want to live my life and don't want to spend the rest of it worrying what I wanna do or what I should've done. I just wanna live and be happy and have no regrets at all.

why grow old so young,

~tSin

Oxygen.

This is a continuation of the supposedly 30 days of writing about myself and giving you more information about me. I've been slacking off and I apologize, yet again, busyness shouldn't be an excuse for not working on this :( However, let me make it up to all of you beginning with this:

Day 13- A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

My letter to that someone who has me recently is going to be plain and simple:

Dear You,

I forgive you for whatever it is that you have done to me. No one is perfect and I'm sure that at some point I've also hurt you in ways I wouldn't have known. But let's put everything in the past now and just move on with our lives like most grown ups do. Well, even kids forgive and forget, so why can't we?

Me.

Got oxygen,

~tSin

They Made a Statue Not a Story.

This is going to be really... tear-jerking or hopefully not. Be the judge though...

Day 14- A picture of you and your family

with Papa and my two sisters ♥

~*~

with Mama and my sis and bro ♥

On this day let me tell you a story... a short story (I will try as much as possible! I'm really gonna try!).

"Once upon a time, a beautiful baby was born with small eyes and reddish skin crying into the night as her mother lay her close singing lullabies to hush her down while her father was away - out late, hopefully, winning a match at a drag race. He had yet to find out that his baby was born and that his life was bound to change for ever. Father then came home with a big victorious grin on his face with a stash of cash in his pocket ready to spend with drunk-thirsty friends, but when he got into the room and saw the sleeping angel all that he could think of was how to begin and just make things right.

So the baby awoke to a world of a princess. Everyone would do as she would ask them to do and everyone adored her like a goddess. She was the most amazing thing that ever happened to her parents. Father changed, mother became somewhat contented. And the years went by so fast, three more kids were born and they continued to live a blissful life like princes and princesses never knowing what lay behind the radiant smile that their father bore and kept. The children were rather oblivious of late night quarrels from the other chamber -- they were made to believe those were shouts of joy and bursts of laughter. It really wasn't. Late night drives were traumatizing and tragic: Mother is too quiet with a creased forehead and pouted lips; Father begins to shout and attempts to hit the car in front; The children cry. But it seemed repairable so with their lives they went on.

Until one night destroyed it all with just a swig of rum. Father was accused of a crime he swore to all of the dwellers of the heavens he never really did, but no one actually believed. It was a downfall of a king and every townsman's back has turned away from him, none of them could look at him in the eye. All his darkness was brought into a light shaming the rest of his clan and even the love of his lovely daughters and son. But wife went on believing him; giving him even more love and attention than he was supposed to. Some strange phone calls connect through home and threats of a mistress their Father never told and a kid on the way. Heartbreaks burst. The kids' minds were in a chaos. Emotionally battered as their friends have also already abandoned them.

They grew up without their Father or rather saw him on and off as he wasn't allowed at the time to be hanging out the streets. It was a sad plight for such beautiful creatures. They lived and survived through prayers. And realize through that hardship how important trust and love is in the family and most importantly God who sees everything; who consoles everyone in the weakest of times. That one part of their lives may have been very difficult and challenging but it has molded them into very strong persons capable of living without depending on the aid of others."

figure me out,

~tSin

If You Ever Love Somebody, Put Your Hands Up!

Before I proceed with Day 12 (the challenge which I've almost abandoned totally, but not yet really!), let me tell you something first. In my previous blog I did mention something about going to the house of the elderlies, just near my home barangay (because that's exactly where it is), I panicked for a moment when the sun broke in because I felt sort of off as in sick-ish. I was slightly feverish and I felt like vomiting. I thought I couldn't make it but lo and behold! I got my mind to work stronger than my body so... long story short... I made it to the Elderly Outreach Program! And boy, am I glad to have come!

I didn't only get to share my blessings but also I gained new friends and spent time with the elderlies who rarely gets any visits at all from their own family :( Very sad, ain't it? I really feel sorry for them being there and all. I don't know the story behind every one of them but I'm pretty sure it isn't as acceptable. How could we abandon these people who've brought us into the world and raised us as the people that we are now? Well, if all of their immediate family have already gone away (as in deceased) then I would understand but if they're living just a stone's throw away from the elderly home then I think somebody ought to wake them up so they could reflect on what they've done.

Most old people can be really bitter, can't they? I've got a grandma of my own who, despite of her bitterness, I love so much and very thankful of having! The moment I got into those elderly people's rooms and find out a bottle of Lacto Pafi on their bedside table... I got teary-eyed and felt really homesick. I miss my grandma so much. I want her back in our house, but her being very stubborn and all, I'm sure that could be very impossible now. I'm just praying that someday she comes back home to us so we could take care of her and show her more love.

I will never send my parents to the home for the aged. Never. No matter what. No matter how they piss me off sometimes.

~*~

On a lighter note, I am now on...

Day 12- How you found out about Blogger and why you made one

Let me make this short and brief, awright?

So I found out about Blogger through Google. I made one because I love writing and blogger is like a secret haven most especially if you don't tell anyone about it at all and just let some random people stumble upon it. I've had too many blogger accounts in the past and I'm just happy now that I'm sticking with this and maintaining it as often as I could. I blog mostly about random stuff and whining, but I could really make sense sometimes in my most lucid moments. Hahah! I hope some of my writings did help some though. I love you, all of you, who cares and gives time to read my blog :) Thank you!

asleep is the sun,

~tSin