Another Inside Story I Can't Tell.

Another downfall lights the way

Begging me to save the day

In these walls I’ve failed to stand

Another useless helping hand

~Taken By Cars, All For a Tuesday

09.30.09 | 06:02:09 | bubbly toes and blood red hair

Yesterday, on our way home:

The Boyfriend: Let's drop by *enter bank name here*

Me: Oh! You've been paid already? (as in the salary)

The Boyfriend: Yep.

Me: Well, that's early. It's still the 29th. Are you sure?

The Boyfriend: I'm sure.

Me: Hmmm... well probably so you can also help out the Ondoy victims.

The Boyfriend: Right! Our supervisor even made us sign this contract as to how much we would want to donate.

Me: Really? And how much are you giving?

The Boyfriend: Five thousand.

Me: *wide eyes* What?

*silence*

Me: *5 minutes after* Tim, I am sooo proud of you.

The Boyfriend: Why?

Me: Cuz you're donating five thousand pesos!

The Boyfriend: *laughs* I was just kidding...

UGH! I wanted to shave his head right there and then! Hahaha! Crazy.

Anyhooser, it must have been three or four days already since the Ondoy devastating calamity... finally, the raging tempest have left us - although mourning and with much loss, it's very heartbreaking to even think about. I am not very updated with the daily news about Ondoy and its aftermath aside from the twits I get from celebrity stars on Twitter, word of mouth is my only source for news. Please don't think that I am utterly nonchalant about what had happened to my countrymen, in fact, I am very proud of those people who took time and to some who have sacrificed their lives to help others. And if I were closer and had a lot more extra moolah to spare... I'd surely spearhead a group to help those poor victims of the typhoon. But since I am in a whole different island (thankfully, safe and sound!) and I am also having a hard time trying to make both ends meet... I am offering my heartfelt prayers for them.

I guess I know how it feels to get stuck in the cold, raging storm... holding on to whatever you can hold on to... walking in knee/waist/shoulder-deep and not to mention very dirty waters... and trying hard to save your home and your life. When I was still a kid, we also experienced the unpredictable wraths of Mother Nature... and I semi-lost my grandfather because of the heavy rain and flood during a storm which I really couldn't remember the name at all. It was devastating already what more this Ondoy has brought to us? I believe about some hundred lives have already been lost... it's crazy. And most of the casualties consist of infants, kids, and women. :(

Good thing really that we have brave souls out there who are willing to help out in whatever way they can. And I'm just hoping that those politicians won't take this time of great loss and heartbreak as an oppurtunity to advertise themselves for the upcoming elections. That would be unforgivable. I hope, too, that the government is doing their best to help these people who have been greatly affected and prolly, it would be wise if they get ready for the 2 other storms which are said to be coming our way any time this week as well. Hopefully, they wouldn't cause as much destruction as Ondoy though. Not now please. Better yet... not anymore.

The Aftermath [photos]:

~this is just überly sad and heartbreaking.

Angry Mother Earth makes humans look like animals lying naked and helpless on the streets, atop debris, lost from a battle never won -- vulnerable and raw. And She doesn't choose who should go... everyone must go. Sinners or not. Which reminds me of Jacque Bermejo.

She's instantly become a superstar over the stormy weekend and now she's released her "OFFICIAL STATEMENT" to clean her name. I bet she's too ashamed to even show her face out the window of her room now. I don't know if I should believe her claim that her FB account has been hacked although I should say that she must have had her point... it's just that she blurted out something outrageously hurtful in the most sensitive of times. Well, we are all entitled to our opinion anyway and negative publicity is still publicity after all... Who knows that Jacque-girl is just fishing for worldwide attention, probably dreaming of becoming the next Paris Hilton or something. Or seriously, I really don't know. It's for you to believe or not. Yes, it's up to you. Anyhow, the truth will surely come out any time soon. I guess... we'll just have to wait for that?

And I'll leave you with this:

"Storm “Ondoy” was a great equalizer. The flood treated everybody, rich and poor, equally. It didn’t play favorites, exempting no one. It made everybody miserable. Celebrities and the influential suffered along with the poor. The rich in their gated communities suffered just as much as the squatters in their shanties."

This guy has surely helped me out. Very well said!

LET'S HELP OUT. It's never too late.

i know how it hurts,

-tSin

Here's A Girl Who Became Popular Over The "ONDOY" Weekend...

Because she said something like this...

now she's got her own "fan club" in Facebook.

It's sooo sad that such people could exist... it's crazy. How could they or she, JACQUE BERMEJO, could think this way? Hello? There are people suffering and dying out there while you are lying comfortably in your nightgown matched perfectly with your cucumber face mask! Why can't you just offer your help or your prayers?! Or if you can't say anything good at all... JUST SHUT THE F*CK UP!

NEVER AGAIN STEP ON THE SOILS OF THE PHILIPPINES YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHING-UNGRATEFUL-WHATEVER!

More of Jacque Bermejo HERE! I've read too many about her... Some said that somebody is just using her picture and name and what not... it's crazy! She's been flooded with hate-comments... I'm not sure anymore if I should pity her or join the rest of the Filipinos in cursing her. Hmp.

Everybody is on a manhunt for Jacque Bermejo.

ban jacque-ass bermejo,

-tSin

Zoom Vroom Kaboom. Go Away ONDOY!

Say, won't you stay; we can talk about nothing at all
We'll sit here and make up the words as we go along
~Scott Porter & the Glory Dogs, Pretend

09.26.09 | 23:43:59 | this is going to be quick

The title is such gobbledygook-iness because it's a Saturday night and I am stuck at home cuz of the storm Ondoy which has now wrecked the most of Manila - imagine, the flood has covered even three storey houses! That is sooo crazy! A number of people have died already and not to mention millions worth of possessions lost as well. But never mind the mundane stuff, what's important are the lives of the people who are out there still fighting the coldness of the very stormy night and the flooded streets.

I am just thankful to be sitting cozy here in front of the computer (despite the "flying-roof" sound that the rooftop is making whenever the wind howls!), keying my rants and delights, enjoying looklet (still!), and savoring the breeze of the electric fan. I couldn't watch the news at all... it's just very depressing really :( I wish the storm would stop already so that no more people would be suffering and no more lives would be lost. I'm really, really praying. Plus, my best friend's boyfriend, along with a hundred more people, is stranded in the NAIA airport -- I hope they will all be safe. I guess something must have seriously irked Mother Nature to be wrecking this part of the world this much... that even the popular artistas didn't escape her. Some of them are even stuck on their rooftops and begging on television via phone-patch for somebody to come rescue them. Lord, please also guide all those brave souls who will risk their lives for the lives of others!

In times like this nothing beats the power of prayers especially when we can't actually go out there to give out physical help. So can we take about five minutes to pray for those who are now suffering because of the typhoon?

Thanks!

On a lighter note, I was trying to kill time and boredom by www-hopping. I also tried to watch Ice Age 3, but I got really sleepy! It's not that the movie is bad or something, I'm just really lazy like this when it comes to watching movies most especially if they are not in my favorite genre. I had to find something else and voila! I stumbled upon this friend's, Kat, blog and found this very interesting and funny post of hers which I am automatically reblogging (obviously. heheh...) right now.

Chadan! Here it is: The Ten Top Trivia Tips About Tsin Joson =)

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Tsin Joson!

1. Tsin Joson was invented in China in the eleventh century, but was only used for fireworks, never for weapons!
2. The National Heart Foundation recommends eating Tsin Joson at least three times a week.
3. Tsin Joson is the sacred animal of Thailand!
4. It's bad luck for a flag to touch Tsin Joson!
5. It is bad luck to light three cigarettes with the same Tsin Joson.
6. American Airlines saved forty thousand dollars a year by eliminating Tsin Joson from each salad served in first class.
7. The difference between Tsin Joson and a village is that Tsin Joson does not have a church.
8. Tsin Joson cannot jump.
9. It is impossible to fold Tsin Joson more than seven times.
10. Tsin Joson has little need for water and is capable of going for months without drinking at all!

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

It's funny how Trivia #10 seem to be real... Yes. I am not a fan of water and I don't know why up to now. I would rather drink juice than water.

So... Go ahead and try it! It's really fun and you'll know some out-of-this-world trivia about yourself that you've never actually heard of! Go go go! :)

i said it was gonna be quick,

-tSin

Come save me from walking off a windowsill or I'll sleep in the rain.

He took the days for pageant
Became as mad as rabbits
With bushels of bad habits
~Panic! At the Disco, Mad As Rabbits

09.26.09 | 05:48:12 | weathering the storm

It's been raining endless (scratching that cuz I might have been exaggerating) for days and there's a storm coming... so, hello STORMY weekend.

I am such a loser... I haven't posted anything at all for the past days. I'm sorry. But I swear I'm gonna fill you up today with news about yours truly.

I guess the main reason why I wasn't able to write or blog is that I got too busy doing OTs (working mostly from 9pm to 9am) and I swear I've been having headaches cuz we've got very high call volume during the past couple or three weeks. I must admit... it was all too exhausting, I almost got sick! But good news dearies, my tummy is now working at its best! Thanks to the very efficient Doctor who prescribed me those very helpful medicines... now I'm stomach-ache free! Yay! I should celebrate, I should. =) And of course, I should remind myself now and then to give the snobs to sodas and coffee (although I seldom, seldom, seldom drink coffee!) and anything else that is acidic so that my stomach could fully recover from its almost dead state. I sure do feel lots better than before I started taking those meds. Gosh! I cant' believe how I've become such a drug addict in a short period of time. Hahaha! Of course I am kidding on being a drug addict! I swear I'm not!

Ok. Enough about that and let's move on. So... while I was away... I spent most of my limited free time on:

-catching up with sleep (sleeping at night is still the best remedy and the best way to detoxify!);

-reading this and this book =);

-watching some movies with The Boyfriend (we've finally finished watching the Terminator Salvation! Christian Bale was sooo hot in that movie!);

-I found a link for that movie 500 Days of Summer (I definitely love their OSTs! And I swear Zooey Deschannel does look like a lot like Katy Perry!!!) so I started to watch it but I got too lazy and impatient waiting for the stream to load I had to stop watching it after 45 minutes;

-a bit of shopping! I finally got myself these:

actually, The Boyfriend gave me that =) Included in the shopping were two new pair of jeans and a couple of dresses which I really, really LOVE (I don't have a picture of it yet though, but I'll update you as soon as I have!) I'm still looking forward to buying a few more dresses.

-celebrating our 14 months together over a sumptuous breakfast of pancakes and ground pork and corned beef and a heart-warming mushroom soup!

-convincing The Boyfriend to go to the beach on a rainy day. I sooo wanted to go because I had a new bikini to flaunt! Haha! But of course I didn't tell The Boyfriend that and it also wasn't the primary reason why I wanted to go anyway - I just wanted to get away from the city for a while and be with him and only him on our special day really :)

so to the beach we went :)
if you wanna see my skimpiness, you can click HERE
but don't blame me if you wouldn't like what you see! haha!

what else kept me busy... *thinking tight*

OH OF COURSE!

-watching The Vampire Diaries series. Elena is really pretty!

-watching the whole new season of GGX (as in Gossip Girl. I just wanna call it GGX!).

I guess... I was just living life the way God wanted me to live it... I am enjoying every moment of it! No matter how tiresome some days got and no matter how I wanted to give up already! Be proud of me cuz I'm still standing strong and HAPPY. =)

And oh! Yesterday, I had my fill of all of my cravings! Well, except for one: POPCORN! But Julie brought some Mojos from Shakey's and I was überly delighted! And then mum brought home some pomelo, lanzones, and sweet corn! I was very, very full - I definitely felt so bloated afterwards! I guess I will never be able to tell my success story on losing a good number of weight without dieting. Ugh! Eating is just too heavenly good to be said no to, right? Who can say NO to FOOD?! Nobody. Unless you're really crazy about your weight or something like it's already psychotic.

Ho-hum... I am just glad -super glad- that it is the weekend already! I could sleep the whole day and then prolly, if it doesnt' rain, go out with Lois and Juno later tonight at The Outpost to catch some good music (I've read from the B.I.T.E Mag that the place is going to play some Ska tonight. We'll see.) and then just enjoy the rest of my days off relaxing or sleeping, per se.

By the way, I just found a new craze (aside from my regular music-hunting)! Let me call it Tsin's Looklet Craze. =) I just love it and it's definitely soooo addictive! Haha! Here are my masterpieces (some beginner's stuff, really. nothing major!):

~they're pretty safe designs and mix-matches.
I always want to stay with comfort and elegance and a bit
(just a tiny bit) of craziness ;)

And right now, I am most looking forward to watching the Inglourious Basterds -- like supermassively! I've been waiting for sooo long so please let me watch already! Then there's the whole new season of Dexter by Monday! I couldn't wait as well!

Alright, time to wrap up now. I've got to go. Let me leave you with this picture of mine -- me wearing the neon pink sunglasses and crazy polka dress! I feel like a kid! Haha!

Is it me? Or is it really? Whenever those weather forecasters tell us there's going to be a storm the sun shines brightly outside... Hmmm... But yeah, I am aware that in another part of the world some are struggling to survive the very strong winds and the chilling rain and of course, praying that their homes won't get lost in the storm. I'll be praying for them, too.

i don't wannna wait,

-tSin

Oh You're Supposed to Care But I Think You're Really Mean.

Then i remember all the nice things
that you've ever said to me,
maybe i'm just over reacting
maybe you're the one for me.
~Lily Allen, Not Fair

09.16.09 | 06:07:32 | stinking

A day like this reminds me of a friend who has got this weird belief that whenever you're having a happy hour there will always be a sappy hour after that. I didn't vocally agree with her back then but at the back of my head I really do agree with her... with all my heart because I have experienced the same thing it's just that I didn't want to convince myself completely that it's really like that. That things just get f*cked up in a blink of an eye. So we go out with this friend and spend the whole day in laughter only to find her really quiet at the end of the day, sulking at one end of the jeepney on our ride home... lost in her own thoughts. And whenever we'd find the courage to ask her what's keeping her so still and quiet she would just shake her head and her forehead would then crease into a frown. Later on we found out about her little theory. I realized I wasn't very alone with that belief. Even Charlie in the book The Perks of Being a Wallflower (which I have proudly finished reading already by the end of last week! hahah!) wrote a thing about that as well. I'll try to put that part here once I find it... as of the moment I'm still browsing through the e-book, trying hard to look for it. :S EDIT: Guess what? You can actually find it here - I made a polaroid postcard of it ;)

Why the drama, you're wondering? I don't know. I've been feeling unwell the past days because of my friggin' stomach. It makes me feel so ill, I wanna stay home and not work at all! Ugh. And just last night... I felt a bit better, prolly cuz I asked for the right medicine from the clinic and it worked! Plus, I didn't feel sleepy at all the whole of my shift! I was thinking that since Julie gave me her very lovely headband... that could've been the reason for my happy state today.

~now look at that? isn't that a beauty?

~a beauty indeed! thanks Julie! :)

Or maybe, I'm just too excited to see the doctor later on although I am also afraid to undergo endoscopy! But I don't think I would mind much because right now I'm just as desperate to know if my stomach will not really be the death of me (cuz with all the pain that it has been giving me these days, it really makes me think that it would be!). I want to be free of this stomach ache forever!

Ok. It's crazy how my mood swings can really swing from center to either hard left or right most of the time. Some minutes ago I was so happy and feeling infinite (or almost) and the next minute I just didn't feel like talking or doing anything at all. *sighs* I hate it whenever my mind runs fast and functions double time... it drives me nuts!

I am also somewhat upset because... remember the Katy Perry concert that I was sooo excited about? I won't be able to go (and that's final) and as though that isn't worst enough... The Boyfriend seems to be very happy about the fact that I won't be able to afford to buy myself a flight ticket and the concert ticket itself. I understand how he cares about my finances but I really wanted to go at least he'd been a bit, even just an inch, supportive. But he wasn't at all. I guess he tried to... I wasn't convinced. Well... looking at the brighter side... at least I will be able to save enough money for my school come back this coming November and money to pay to Chiclois, since I will be buying her phone (a really cool one, I should say!) and not going to the concert means more money to spend on dresses :)

I am particularly eyeing these (for parties and night outs, right?):

check it out here :)

hi reina,
-tSin

OMG! It's Amazing That I'm Still Breathing!

I'm out on my own again

Face down in the porcelain

Feeling so high but looking so low

~Katy Perry, Lost

09.13.09 | 04:12:09 | i just can't hide it

I am really, really, REALLY almost out of breath right now! Because I just found out that the loveliest and most talented and artistic person alive (in my book!) KATY PERRY is going to have a concert in Manila, in SM MOA to be exact, on the 3rd of October 2009 and that's a Saturday! Yes! I've written that right - she is going to Manila to grace us with her awesome music and style! I couldn't help being sooo excited about it. The tix prices range from a good Php400 (but for sure that's gonna take you waaaayyyy to the back of the concert area!) to Php3,500 (if you've got money to splurge and you really love Katy Perry you should take that, I say!) - not very bad, right? EDIT: Here's the seat map for the concert (just so you can see how far the Bronze seats at Php400 are!):

Sooo... Did I already say that I'm very excited about her concert? Haha! I truly, really, certainly am! After reading this article about the concert details I then logged on to CebuPacificAir.com to check on the prices for the flights and guess what I've found? They are actually running this Php1000.00 off promotion for all flights EACH WAY! And I found very good prices for the flight: P3,867.20 for two people, roundtrip! Isn't that heavenly AMAZING and not to mention fabulously AWESOME?! Oh my! I haven't bought the flight tix yet cuz I still have to confirm if I can really go and will also have to consult The Boyfriend plus I don't have a credit card (nope, not anymore.) to use to purchase the flight tix :(( As for the Cebu Pacific promo there is a code that you can use so you can get the Php1000.00 off each way ;) The code? TWEET. The promotion is also good for some other destinations as well -- I've checked on Clark and Singapore, too. Just because. Hehe...

~yes, the poster.

OH I HOPE AND WISH AND PRAY THAT I CAN WATCH KATY PERRY'S CONCERT! That would be a very nice advance Christmas gift if I could go! I really, really, really wanna go - like seriously. I really am a big fan of Katy Perry! I swear! And if anyone, as in anyone at all, could get me tickets to Katy Perry's concert FOR FREE... God bless you! =)

And btw, Katy Perry will also be playing with Boys Like Girls... so if you're not sooo into Perry then prolly the Boys Like Girls band will give you consolation. Nevertheless, it's going to be a great one cuz Katy Perry will be there! And I am soooo excited. Irrational cuz I'm not even sure yet if I could really go at all, but I am very, very hopeful that I could. Hmmm...

Anyhooser, here are some photos of Katy Perry and you can check more of this right here: iheartkatyperry

~AH! Who wouldn't wanna watch her live?!

Get your tickets at the TicketWorld NOW!!! =)

please let me see perry,

-tSin

I Went to the Bathroom to Count My Hair.

Purify the colours,

Purify my mind.
~Arcade Fire, Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)

04:54:23 | 09.10.09 | they can't be saved

The past weeks have been mercilessly making me gasp for air every second... I'm not impressed. In fact, right now, I want to scream like this:

*Sigh*

Aside from the fact, that I am very sleepy at the moment... yes, I am also very frustrated - my heart is already dead tight and my muscles are all constricted cuz I've been stopping controlling my negative emotions from breaking and flying free. I bet it would feel good to yell at somebody or something. Hmmm... it wouldn't be a very good time to watch a sappy movie because I would definitely break down into tears, even if I'd be watching Gossip Girl (by the way, season 3 is coming up this Monday, I should be happy right?). Ugh. My head is throbbing, but I won't be moved. I've got to survive this week and the week after and then I could finally rest and prolly get some good time for sleep. I shouldn't lose my temper otherwise I would lose my mind. Hmpft.

It's not the pressure that's making me feel this way - tired and worn out most of the time. I'm not sure what it is. I'm probably too used up saying and doing the same things everyday, I get tongue tied every now and then and my throat dries up. Thanks to those who wake me up with their shouting over the phone and their sometimes very complicated cases, I wouldn't have lasted the day without them. Awesome.

I wouldn't want to hover on the fact that I am almost bored with what I'm doing... I don't want to convince myself that I am because I love working in wherever I am working (I don't want to tell, so?) and I really, really want to last for more than a year here. Like really want to. I'd do anything to stay without compromising the quality of my job. *crossing fingers*

I really, really hope I could get some sleep later. I am just very sleepy...


almost done,

~tSin

Fingerprints.

no. i didn't have a very good week at all. but i am hoping, crossing my fingers, and praying to God that the next week will be better than this. let me not be sleepy. let me not be lazy.

then, heading off,

-tSin

It's Way Past Time and I Still Can't Sleep.

There was a commotion in the room. Noise and hisses - I opened my eyes, everything was black... or gray. I wasn't sure. I moved my fingers, they were numb and I felt like I was tightly tied to whatever it was I was lying down on.

"What happened?" came a familiar voice of a man.

"I don't know, kuya," was the reply of another voice that I have known all of my life. "She was having a hard time sleeping and she asked me to get a glass of water..." the voice trailed off.

"And?" probed the first voice.

"She drank this tiny medicine."

"Medicine? What medicine?" the first voice asked, panic could be recognized in his voice.

What is going on? I wanted to ask, but I still couldn't move at all.

"I don't know. I-I didn't ask. But she kept it right -"

There was a sound of some things being lifted, no, thrown away hurriedly... not even allowing the second voice to finish his sentence. And then some plastic.

"How many did she take? Did you see?" asked the first voice gasping for breath.

"I didn't. Maybe one or two. I'm not sure, kuya," the second voice, which I finally recognized was my brother's, replied with a quiver of worry.

I then realized they were talking about me. I wasn't bounded then, the room wasn't dark... I might be... No. I couldn't even say or think of the word. No way. Not now. I've got to get back.

Everything that happened that day flashed back. The stressful day and my mind couldn't stop thinking and analyzing and re-analyzing things. The sight of that helpful (or maybe not at all) medicine. The medicine that would probably lull me to sleep forever now.

"Anna? Anna?" the first voice, my boyfriend's, shouted.

He might have shook me awake, but I couldn't move. My mouth couldn't even utter a single word and my eyes won't open still. I felt cold, really cold like I was locked up in a freezer or an ice truck. I couldn't see anything, but I could hear everything: the howling wind, the swaying trees, the breathlessness of the men in the room, the electricity running through the wires, the sound of children running and laughing outside the house, the goats munching on their lunch of grass - all of which sounded so clear to me.

I am drifting away... farther now.

I want to go back.

"Anna?"

I didn't recognize anymore who called my name last. I was lost.


singing myself a lullaby,

-tSin

Tomorrow It May Change.

Give me a little time
Leave me alone a little while
Maybe its not too late
Not today, today, today, today, today
~Avril Lavigne, Tomorrow

12:20:49 | 09.03.09 | happy birthday unx

Please accept my apologies for the gobbledygook. My anger is always short-lived, believe me. I never get angry in more than 24 hours... I am just never that kind of person. Before I almost lost my temper some hours ago, I was actually composing this blog but of course I had to stop. I got really irritated with the phone ringing and my head was thudding kind of fast I wanted to go home that instant... I even wanted to quit right there and then just because I felt so awful and tired. :( But now I feel much a bit better and in a little while I'd be off to bed for full recovery and I'm hoping and praying (so much) that we won't be getting too many calls tonight! Please! Umpf. Why the heck am I talking about my work here? Ok. Ok... moving on.

Yesterday, I got a very wonderful message from GOD through this wonderful application in FB and yes I really would want to share this here to remind me that no matter how my brain has been wired faultily... I was still made in God's own image and I could be as perfect as He is if I would choose to. Did that make sense? Anyway, here is God's message to me:

Tsin got a message that on this day, God wants you to know...

... that you are perfect as you are.
God doesn't create faulty life. No. Everything created by God is perfect, and so are you.

So stop driving yourself mad with endless ways to improve, and just accept the glory of your being as is.

Of course God never creates a faulty life and as in never. It's just that people, like me, choose to have a faulty one. I have realized a long time ago that whatever happens to my life I will it to happen because I really believe that everything has already been laid out already, has been planned, has been written - maktub as Coelho would put it. That's why most of the time I just let everything fall into place because in the past I was that kind who always wanted to have everything figured out - even those parts that aren't worth figuring out. I was always afraid and uncertain about the future and more often than not, I was insecure of myself that is why I make sure that I always make plans and stick to them... otherwise I would be upset. But then I over-organized (I made that one up so don't bother looking that up in the dictionary. heheh...) myself. I missed out on a lot of things and have even detached myself from the people I cared most for a while. I was really too hard on myself back then and even now sometimes I still drive myself mad with endless ways to improve. I still make plans inside my head but then get really too lazy to realize them. I think I have finally learned to accept the glory of my being as I am. I'm also very sure that God has a beautiful plan for me... I'll be holding on to that fact. Yes. I'm gonna quit trying hard too much cuz as I've noticed the harder I try the farther I drift away from reality and it's crazy. (And weird I know.)

So I guess it's time I hit the sheets of my pink bed now. I've got to sleep I need some energy to not lose my temper very fast again tonight.

help me be good, my Lord,

-tSin

P.S.

HERE'S the other thing that I've written today. :)

Aside from being OUTRAGED today.
I wrote the 100 things that would help me fight loneliness and anger.

and I'm outraged no more! =)

~tSin

...

I AM OUTRAGED.

and tired.

can the font not get any larger than that?! ugh!

I Am Looking Forward

to going home and I hope and wish and pray that aside from Granny and Pop who are regular people of the house during the day - I will be alone so I could make all those mixtapes that have been running to my head and burn loads of discs so that I can free up more spaces in the computer. And just in case I forget... I've got to download songs from these people:

Colbie Caillat - Oxygen
Black Kids
The Doors
The Smiths
That song "ASLEEP"

Make album copies of Taking Back Sunday.

*sigh* I wish I will have the house alone! I wish!


please,

-tSin