I Went to the Bathroom to Count My Hair.

Purify the colours,

Purify my mind.
~Arcade Fire, Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)

04:54:23 | 09.10.09 | they can't be saved

The past weeks have been mercilessly making me gasp for air every second... I'm not impressed. In fact, right now, I want to scream like this:

*Sigh*

Aside from the fact, that I am very sleepy at the moment... yes, I am also very frustrated - my heart is already dead tight and my muscles are all constricted cuz I've been stopping controlling my negative emotions from breaking and flying free. I bet it would feel good to yell at somebody or something. Hmmm... it wouldn't be a very good time to watch a sappy movie because I would definitely break down into tears, even if I'd be watching Gossip Girl (by the way, season 3 is coming up this Monday, I should be happy right?). Ugh. My head is throbbing, but I won't be moved. I've got to survive this week and the week after and then I could finally rest and prolly get some good time for sleep. I shouldn't lose my temper otherwise I would lose my mind. Hmpft.

It's not the pressure that's making me feel this way - tired and worn out most of the time. I'm not sure what it is. I'm probably too used up saying and doing the same things everyday, I get tongue tied every now and then and my throat dries up. Thanks to those who wake me up with their shouting over the phone and their sometimes very complicated cases, I wouldn't have lasted the day without them. Awesome.

I wouldn't want to hover on the fact that I am almost bored with what I'm doing... I don't want to convince myself that I am because I love working in wherever I am working (I don't want to tell, so?) and I really, really want to last for more than a year here. Like really want to. I'd do anything to stay without compromising the quality of my job. *crossing fingers*

I really, really hope I could get some sleep later. I am just very sleepy...


almost done,

~tSin